6 definitions by bls1999
The day after Thanksgiving where your family gets cabin fever and begins to hurl obscenities at each other. Also known as Fucksgiving.
Linda: How did everyone like the food last night?
Cletus: It was good, but not great. Like Trump is going to make America.
Linda: Fuck you Cletus, you had to bring politics into this?
*Alex enters*
Alex: Ah, I see Fuckyousgiving came early this year!
Cletus: It was good, but not great. Like Trump is going to make America.
Linda: Fuck you Cletus, you had to bring politics into this?
*Alex enters*
Alex: Ah, I see Fuckyousgiving came early this year!
by bls1999 November 22, 2018
If you've ever eaten a burger or a steak, and it's undercooked, you say "A little iodine and that thing could walk again!", implying that it's only a minor cut, and the animal could come back to life if iodine (a cut medicine) was applied.
Waiter: Here's your steak, sir.
Customer: *Cuts into the Steak, sees that it is raw.*
Waiter: Is everything OK?
Customer: Actually, no.
Waiter: What's wrong?
Customer: Weeeell, let's just say... A little iodine and that thing could walk again.
Waiter: Oh, no. Terribly sorry, sir.
But you know he isn't sorry. They never are.
Customer: *Cuts into the Steak, sees that it is raw.*
Waiter: Is everything OK?
Customer: Actually, no.
Waiter: What's wrong?
Customer: Weeeell, let's just say... A little iodine and that thing could walk again.
Waiter: Oh, no. Terribly sorry, sir.
But you know he isn't sorry. They never are.
by bls1999 May 27, 2013
When you really need to poop, but you're in the middle of doing something. Instead, you rush to the toilet to make a down payment, which means taking part of your poop and quickly returning to the activity that is occupying you. Usually, making a down payment implies that you will return to the toilet and make the rest of your "payment" later, but it doesn't have to.
Keith: Ben, I've got to take a dump.
Ben: But we're in the middle of a game of pool!
Keith: Don't worry, I'll make a down payment. Won't even take a minute.
Ben: *sigh* okay.
Ben: But we're in the middle of a game of pool!
Keith: Don't worry, I'll make a down payment. Won't even take a minute.
Ben: *sigh* okay.
by bls1999 September 20, 2014
Stands for "bend over and smile." It's what you do when you just have to deal with something you're getting screwed on.
Keith: Damnit, I've gotta stay late at work.
Ben: BOAS, dude. You've gotta make a living.
Keith: Psh, alright fine.
Joe: What the hell??? Verizon charges over $100 for my plan.
Keith: BOAS my friend. You know they have the best service in our area.
Joe: Why do you always have to be right, Keith?
Ben: BOAS, dude. You've gotta make a living.
Keith: Psh, alright fine.
Joe: What the hell??? Verizon charges over $100 for my plan.
Keith: BOAS my friend. You know they have the best service in our area.
Joe: Why do you always have to be right, Keith?
by bls1999 February 20, 2015
A close relative of "you don't know where that's been." Creeping crud is when you don't know what invisible germs and dirt is on a surface and you try not to touch it. The term can also be used to describe an unidentifiable substance, or to describe crud that is, in fact, creeping.
Ex. 1
Keith: Ben, I wouldn't take your shoes off in this smelly locker room; there could be some creeping crud in here.
Ben: Good thinking!
Ex. 2
Keith: What the hell is that?
Ben: Ah, just some creeping crud.
Keith: Right, better steer clear of that shit.
Ex. 3
Keith: OH MY GOD THE CRUD IS CREEPING.
Ben: WHAT KIND OF CANCEROUS THINGS ARE LIVING HERE?!
Keith: RUN, BEFORE THEY MUTATE EVEN MORE!!!
Keith: Ben, I wouldn't take your shoes off in this smelly locker room; there could be some creeping crud in here.
Ben: Good thinking!
Ex. 2
Keith: What the hell is that?
Ben: Ah, just some creeping crud.
Keith: Right, better steer clear of that shit.
Ex. 3
Keith: OH MY GOD THE CRUD IS CREEPING.
Ben: WHAT KIND OF CANCEROUS THINGS ARE LIVING HERE?!
Keith: RUN, BEFORE THEY MUTATE EVEN MORE!!!
by bls1999 April 11, 2015
An insurance pee is similar to plain old peeing. The only difference is that the insurance pee is usually taken, regardless of if they need to, when the pee-er isn't sure of when they'll encounter another bathroom.
Insurance pees are usually taken before leaving for an unknown or unfamiliar destination, or upon discovering a bathroom at said destination.
Insurance pees are usually taken before leaving for an unknown or unfamiliar destination, or upon discovering a bathroom at said destination.
by bls1999 July 30, 2018