3 definitions by SweatyD.C.ballsack

Top Six worst foods:

6: Pizza: It is actually cardboard with ketchup and plastic cheese. How they screw, I don't know.

5: Pasta Salad: If I vomited and put it on my plate, it would look more appetizing then what they cook.

4: Sloppy Joes: No need to explain

3: Hot Dogs: Recently featured on Fear Factor, they have since brought it to the AU cafe. they never cook new ones, they just reheat them day-after-day-after-day. They look fossilized and half petrified. The chef told me himself he recooked a hotdog since 1984.

2:Cereal: How they manage to fuck this up is beyond me.

1: Exotic rices: They're attempt to cook Spanish rice is a disgrace to the Latino community and has insulted recent ambassadors from Chile and Panama. They have since declared TDR the worst place to eat, on Earth. It not only tastes like plastic but it looks like crap. Don't eat unless you have a death wish.

-1: Chicken a.k.a. chainsaw chicken a.k.a what the fuck is that?: It is as hard as a jawbreaker and your jaw will get tired from chewing the first piece. It is an absolute last resort when you are starving because sometimes the salad is old and moldy.

also known as "Shit.D.R", it is American Universities way of torturing the student body. It was recently approved by Dick Cheney and the Pentagon as an advanced form of enhanced interrogation/torture for Guantanamo Bay. If you eat here for dinner and walk out alive, consider yourself lucky. Bear Grilles is afraid of eating at TDR. If you come here, expect a hospital visit within the first 24 hours. Food here looks like what they fed Indiana Jones in the movie "The Temple of Doom". The only good food is on orientation day and the minute your parents leave, Hell descends upon American University. The beef here is actually dog food.

Dodge Durangos are the leading cause of death on G.W. campus because of the lack of campus and its obscure position next to a major roadway. Tuition at G.W. is the among the highest in the United States, which causes parents to sell younger siblings and themselves on the street corner. Students here are snobby assholes who own big SUVs to compensate for the little dicks. They like to think they're smart but in reality they got accepted because they're stupid enough to pay the tuition, which is so high it could feed Zimbabwe and Cambodia for five years. Former alum include such dictators as Raul Castro, Hugo Chavez, and Saddam Hussein, which leads to my point that this school was built by secret Pentagon and CIA funds to train dictators. They're curriculum promotes homegrown terrorism and worldwide domination. Some say the virus AIDs was started here.